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How to Talk to People Who Don’t Understand Chronic Pain


Explaining Fibro: A Friendly Guide for Friends, Family, and Workmates

Living with fibromyalgia often feels like navigating two different worlds. One world is full of daily challenges—pain, fatigue, and the invisible struggles that come with fibro. The other world is the one outside, where friends, family, and colleagues might not fully understand what fibromyalgia is or how it impacts my life. Over the years, I’ve learned a few ways to open up these conversations in a gentle, conversational manner. Here’s how I explain fibromyalgia in different settings.

Talking about your Fibromyalgia and your daily challenges allows friends and family to understand your daily struggles.

Talking to Friends and Family

When chatting with those closest to me, I try to be as open and honest as possible. I share my experiences in a way that feels personal—because the truth is, fibromyalgia isn’t just an “illness,” it’s a way of life. Here are a few things I mention:

  • Be Personal: “Living with fibro isn’t just about having pain—it’s also about dealing with fatigue and sometimes even brain fog that makes everyday tasks a challenge.”
  • Use Comparisons: I sometimes say, “Imagine feeling like you’re running on empty every day, even after a full night’s sleep. That’s a bit what fibro feels like.”
  • Invite Questions: “If you’re curious or have any questions, please ask. I know it might seem confusing from the outside.”

Using personal stories and clear examples helps them see that while the details of fibromyalgia might be complex, the daily struggles are very real.


Explaining Fibro to Employers and Workmates

Work can be a sensitive topic when you have an invisible illness. The key is to balance honesty with professionalism:

  • Keep It Clear: “I manage a chronic condition called fibromyalgia. It means that on some days, simple tasks like concentrating or staying upright can be really challenging.”
  • Explain Without Overwhelming: “There are days when my energy is really low, which might mean I need to take a break or work at a slightly slower pace. It’s not that I’m not giving my best—it’s just how my body sometimes responds.”
  • Offer Solutions: “I’m more than willing to discuss ways to make work more manageable”. Offer to discuss reasonable adjustments to working day.
  • Stay Positive: Emphasise that you’re still passionate about your work and committed, despite the challenges.

This approach not only informs your employer or colleagues about your condition but also helps set realistic expectations while opening the door for potential adjustments or support.

It’s Good To Talk About Your Fibromyalgia Symptoms

A Friendly Reminder for All Conversations

No matter who you’re talking to, it helps to remember that fibromyalgia is an invisible illness. Not everyone will immediately grasp what it means, and that’s okay. A few friendly tips for these conversations include:

  • Stay Patient: Understand that it might take a little time for people to fully appreciate your experience.
  • Educate Gently: Point them toward a resource or article if they’re interested in learning more.
  • Express Your Needs: Whether you need someone to simply listen or to help accommodate your situation, being upfront about your needs makes a big difference.
  • Respect Your Own Journey: Remember, every fibro journey is personal. It’s perfectly fine to share only what you feel comfortable with.

In Conclusion

Opening up about fibromyalgia isn’t always easy. Whether you’re discussing it with friends, family, or at work, finding the right words is a balancing act between honesty and practicality. The aim is simply to create understanding—one conversation at a time.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences. How have you explained your health challenges to others, or how have you supported someone with an invisible illness? Share your stories in the comments below. Let’s keep the conversation going and support each other on this journey.

Thanks for reading, and remember—you are not alone in this.


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